She just used a chaser for red wine.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
