dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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