Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
