I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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