everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
