So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
