they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
This baby is an asshole
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
