S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
