Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Randomize