i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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