Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
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Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
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i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
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