you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
