Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
