omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
either way he was missing a nipple.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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