I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
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I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
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she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
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