I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize