Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Randomize
