how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
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