come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
