I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize