Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize