Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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