If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize