This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
