first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
As shirtless as possible
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
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