so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Randomize
