Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
What a fucking waste of an outfit
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
