She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
