Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
