What a fucking waste of an outfit
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
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