dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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