:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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