so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize