I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
We left the knife in your bed.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Randomize
