i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Randomize
