I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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