areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
foreskin is a definite game changer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize