I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
