It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
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