my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Randomize
