I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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