I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
just tell him i said nine months
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
