Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
