I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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