the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize