how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
I have peed in a lot of sinks
false alarm, still single
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
