We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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