I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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