i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
