I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize