dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
Randomize
