Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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